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WRONG REASONS TO MARRY



The divorce rate and broken homes nowadays is so alarming to the point of depressing. Unfortunately i have realised people marry for the wrong reason destroying the sanctity of marriage. In most things in life we dont have  choice for example the family you are born into but one thing you have a choice is in choosing a life partner. So why go about it the wrong way knowing that the future of your purpose and kids is reliant on making the right choice. Some reasons why some get married is a sure sign that sooner or later the marriage will hit the rocks.


HERE ARE SOME WRONG REASONS WHY SOME PEOPLE GET MARRIED:

1: LONELINESS:
Never marry because you are lonely and looking for someone to solve your loneliness problem especially the female folks. Thats definitely digging a big hole to bury yourself in. Marriage never solves loneliness problems, it only reveals it and makes it worse. While you are single you have to learn to be by yourself, learn to enjoy your own company because in marriage most of the times a nagging partner or a partner that always seeks attention wears the other person out and causes friction before you know it each of them may seek attention elsewhere and the seed of infidelity is sown.

2: SEX: 
Sex is one of the poorest reason to get married. Some people only agree in bed, outside it they are always at each other's throat never agreeing to anything. How will that kind of marriage survive the storm? Never marry because you enjoy sex or both of you are sexually comparltible. What will both parties do when their incompatibility affects the sexual appetite? Sometimes, they seek solace outside or even search out new sex partners because they feel the sex life has gotten boring. Sex is vital in marriage but it should not be the reason why you marry.

3: FEELING LEFT OUT: 
This applies mostly to girls especially when they feel that everyone else is getting married so they rush and get married to the next available Tom, Dick or Harry forgetting they are in for the long haul. After rushing in a few months to a few years they are rushing out. Dont marry because wedding bells are ringing every where and you are hearing your biological clock ticking so loudly. Haste have not helped anybody.

4: FEELING OLD ENOUGH: 
That you are old enough age wise doesnt count marriage wise because there are so many immatured overgrown babies that doesnt know squat about marriage. The females get excited about just the wedding day oblivious that marriage comes hours later. The males after dilly dallying with every female under their radar starts looking for an unspoiled inexperienced female to strap to themselves because they can smell middle age crisis. Its ironic how same guys that sleep around protect their sisters as if the ones they sleep with are not someone's sister. Dont marry because you are old enough.

5: FAMILY PRESSURE: 
Despite the fact we are in twenty first century most families still pressure their offsprings to marry someone they had already selected forgetting it takes more than one's origin to make a home. The funny thing is when problem starts the family become referree for the marriage and a marriage thats always under scutiny of the public hardly survive it. Don't marry because of family pressure, regrets often follow it.

6: MONEY AND FINANCIAL NEEDS: 
This happens on both sides. Because of the state of the economy and level of some families on the societal strata they go in search of people that will meet their financial needs and marry them. There are so many things wrong with these on so many levels: the person may die suddenly before you have the chance to claim some asset and you will now have to fight family members for it, things can go wrong and the money will be gone, what will u do then file for divorce? 
7: GUILT
Please, please and please never marry anyone out of guilt or feeling of indebtedness. It wears thin over time and it never survived challenges and shocks that hit marriages. If you have gone out of your way to help the opposite sex, dont hold it as a condition over their head to marry because he or she will never love you for you and you will always feel you are not loved enough. Allow them to love and honor you of their free will independent of the help you may have rendered.

Marry because you are emotionally, financially, spiritually, mentally ready. Marry for love, compatibility, purpose.

VICTORIA UKPAKA

VICTORIA UKPAKA

human physiologist. writer (poetry, fiction, essay). motivational speaker. blogger. resource personnel.

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